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Employee Lounge

You've got 5 minutes... ENJOY yourself!

Andyco 3rd Annual Employee
Family Fun Day This Saturday!

"Winky" will be on hand to teach the kids safety tips such as staying away from strangers in odd-looking costumes.

You bring your problems home all year. Now's your chance to bring your problems to work for the day (ha, ha, ha!). Yes, it's Family Fun Day -- a great day full of food, fun, and special activities the whole family will enjoy.

Kicking things off, Edith and the girls from the cafeteria will be cooking up their specialty - boiled hotdogs and chips. And once again, Pete from Dispatch will be selling his home-made venison jerky... always a favorite with the little ones!
But that's not all. They'll be safety tips for the kids (see inset), and Jerry from Marketing will lead the children in a craft project created from old PowerPoint printouts.

Teams are still being formed for the popular "Andyco Fun Day Olympics". Please speak to your department head if you're interested. We still need people for the javelin toss, the uneven parallel bars, and the Greco-Roman wrestling.
The festivities will begin at 9 AM in the Andyco parking area (Lots D-F). Don't miss this chance to spend a Saturday with all the people you see Monday through Friday! Hope to see you there!!

**Andyco Health Advisory**

Attn. Andyco Employees: The Human Resources Department (HRD) has just issued a health advisory relating to workplace hazards such as Carpal Tunnel Syndrome (CTS) and other Repetitive Task Injuries (RTIs). Please read the following information as soon as possible (ASAP) and contact your supervisor (SOB) if you have further questions.

Carpal Tunnel Syndrome:
	CTS, the most common RTI, is a direct result of repetitive motions such as typing, twisting levers on a vending machine, or constantly screwing over coworkers (see diagram A).
Caramel Tunnel Syndrome:
	Less common than Carpal Tunnel, Caramel Tunnel Syndrome results from employees repeatedly reaching for the free caramels and/or mint candies found at the reception desk (see diagram B).

Signs to Watch For:
Warning signs range from mild discomfort to severe pain. Please note: If your hand looks like the one to the right, please seek medical attention immediately!

CEO spearheads interoffice cookie drive. Asks employees to pull together for a worthy cause, OR ELSE!

Andy V is to pleased to kickoff the annual spring cookie drive with a personal order for 2 boxes of mint chocolate swirls. Like last year, all proceeds go to his 7-year old niece's Brownies Troop 157. To make ordering even easier this year, employees can order online with the handy form below and have the total deducted from their paycheck. And here's more great news! In appreciation of your hard work and loyalty, we've created the "Cookie of the Week" Plan. That's 52 boxes - one a week for a whole year - delivered right to your cubicle for only $249.95!

Employee Name
Employee Number
Department
Select Cookie Type	Mint Chocolate Swirls Fudgy-Fudge Deluxe Chippy-Dippy Supremes Vanilla Fish Fingers
Quantity (Select one)
o

Job Postings: Andyco is legally required to post and interview for new positions internally before we end up hiring someone from outside the company anyway. We're looking for motivated individuals who are eager for more responsibility, not more money. If this sounds like you, visit our jobs section!

Welcome to Andyco's Employee Lounge

The web page dedicated to YOU, the Andyco employee. Feel free to refer to this section often (on your own time, of course) for the very latest in employee news and information.

Have you seen me?
Call x1433!!

Hilde, our office supply manager is looking for a stapler reported missing from the supply room last Wednesday. It has a brown wood-like finish with the words "Swingline" on the side. If you have seen it, please report to the Supply Department at x1433. Please remember that unauthorized use of office supplies is grounds for immediate termination. Have a great day!! :)

Andyco Cafeteria
Lunch Specials

Mmmm-mmmm! Edith and the girls are cooking up a storm at the company cafeteria. Here's what's cookin'!

Monday
Veal Cutlets w/ marinara sauce: Breaded cutlets with just a hint of freezer burn, smothered in canned tomato sauce and topped with cheese wiz. $3.99

Tuesday
Hotdog with chips: If you like beef byproducts, you'll love our hotdog platter! Comes with your choice of ketchup or mustard (or both!) and a modest helping of chips. $2.99

Wednesday
Mystery Stew: You've heard of "hump day". Well this Wednesday's "lump day"! Edith's Famous Mystery Stew is chock full of unidentified lumps of food, simmered for hours in a greasy brown sauce. Served with lumpy mashed potatoes. $3.99

Thursday
Veal Cutlets w/ marinara sauce: Waste not, want not! There's always leftover veal - so here it is again! If you missed it on Monday, then Thursday is your luck day! $3.99

Friday
Seafood Salad Sandwich: We're not sure what "seafood" means, but at this price, who cares! With all that mayonnaise, you can barely taste it anyway. $4.99

How do you feel about working at Andyco?

Like It!

Really Like It !!

Love It !!!

Really Love It!!!!

Results From Last Week's Employee Poll: 93% of employees surveyed liked working for a cat.

Here are some helpful guidelines to help make your workday more productive and enjoyable!

Refrain from idle chitchat with coworkers

Avoid excessive use of e-mail and the Internet. Remember, we're watching you :)

Keep a positive attitude. (You don't want to piss off your boss!)

Don't waste office supplies. It's bad for the environment, and you could LOSE YOUR JOB!!

No time for lunch? Eat at your desk.

Most of all, have FUN!!!